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Everyone Has Needs

5/5/2010

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First, we all want to be loved and accepted. I do not care how many times a young person says they do not care. I do not care how many times a person says they do not care what people think of them. We all really do care. We want acceptance. If, for some reason, we do not get that love as a child, we get a little "off-balance." It changes the way we see life.
For example, if we do not have the love and acceptance as a child, we get "warped" by it. If we had to always go around "on eggshells" to please a parent, we missed something important. If we grow up with a parent that can never admit that they do wrong, we get "warped." It makes us go through life thinking that we never have acceptance. We think that we have to do something special to earn it. It can go so far as "warping" our thinking that we will never have love or be accepted. Sometimes, this drives a person to do some really stupid things, all in the name of acceptance. Why do you think a girl runs to a guy, when dad has not been there for her? She wants that male attention. She wants that male acceptance.
Second, we need to have roots. I am talking about those "deep down, dirt grabbing, holding on tight roots." We need to be a part of something. We need to be in. No wonder so many young people join gangs. They want to be "in."
Third, we all want to do something worth while. We have this need to make a difference in someone's life. We want to count. We really do want people to look up to us. We want to feel important. This makes us feel special. It sets us apart. Even when we say we do not want attention, we do.
Fourth, we want to know that everything will be alright. We want to know that the bridge is not going to fall, if we walk across it. We want security. It is like those times, when you are alone at home, and you just want to know that the windows and doors are locked. You want to feel secure in who and what you are and your life.
Last, We want knowledge. We want to share it. We would love for once in your lives to feel like we know something that other people want to know. We want to be the "bearers of the secret knowledge." Deep, deep down, we pray that everyone on the planet wants to know what WE KNOW.
As writers, this all comes back around full circle. When a person picks up our book, purchases it, reads it, and then says, "Wow, that was a great book," we sigh. Our need is met.
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